4999 days

Two things happened this week that made me think of the beginning.  

The beginning of us.  

I saw this great idea for a Valentine's day card.  As I calculated the days of our love I was surprised.  Nearly 5000 days! Wow!

It got me to thinking about the early days of our love.  The day we met.  The romance and quick pace of getting to know each other, long distance.  The TWO cards a day I got for the first FIVE months.  The moving in together to soon, the figuring that out.  

It's just neat to remember all this stuff. 

Then a friend posted a little game on FB where they pick an age and you say where you were then and where you are now.  She picked 24.  I thought all about being 24.  I lived in NJ and drove a little honda civic.  Who had your heart? was one of the questions.  OMGosh did Lawrence ever have my 24 year old heart.  Sometimes I wish I could trade our more mature and responsible love for that can't get enough of you love that we had at 24.  It's fun to think of that love, because it's this love, and it's important to remember that. 

To look at each other with fresh eyes and remember why and how we fall in love.  To live out THIS love story, because it's ours and it's good, even if it does get buried under to do lists and karate classes.  

We've been through a lot in the last 4,999 days.  I'm difficult sometimes and he's difficult sometimes, we've been through a lot. Each year adds new prospective and new adventures and new things to love.  

I'm reading the book Love Does by Bob Goff.  It's great.  I'm so blessed to have love moving me each day, that I am surrounded by it and always have been.  To think back at all the little ways he's taken care of me over the past 4,999 days, the very first things that swept me off my feet and the things now that I might sometimes take for granted.  Lawrence is thoughtful and amazing.  I am a very, very lucky girl.  

Happy Valentine's Day, wishing you all a day filled with love.

In lieu of a Father's Day Card...

When I met Lawrence I knew very early on that he was the one I wanted to marry.  He was loving and respectful and generous.  He treated me the way I'd always deserved and wanted to be treated.  He was different than anyone else I'd ever know.  I fell in love with him so quickly.  


I was looking for a man for me.  I didn't give it much thought as to the type of father I was looking for for my future kids.  I wasn't looking for a man for them.  I remember seeing him with his brother's niece at a party, I thought it was cute that would rather color with her than socialize with the adults.  That was the first glimpse I got of how he might be as a father.  


I didn't grow up with a father so I didn't know what kind of man I'd be looking for anyway.


How naive I was to think that I found a man who would be content coloring with my kids all the live long day.  


Parenting was far harder than we ever imagined.  No sleep was far harder than we ever imagined.  But it was also more wonderful than we'd ever imagined.  


He was more wonderful.  


And he was different.  I've learned now that there's a lot more to being a good dad than liking to color and be around kids.  


Luckily, there was more to him too!


When I see him wrestle with his son, or call his middle daughter "Buds", or watch him watch Ninja Warrior with his oldest under his arm...my mind can barely wrap around what a good dad they have.  What a good man I have.  


When I thought he was being too hard on Lily during her toddlerhood, I was wrong.  She respects him in ways that she will never respect me, they all do.  When I worried that maybe he wouldn't ever bond with Addie the way he had with Lily, I was wrong, he found a special relationship with her that is one of the closest in our family.  When I thought there was no way he'd have the patience to take three kids out and about, I was wrong, he was even able to coach soccer and baseball with all three of them in tow.  He surprises and amazes me every day.  


I never understood that I had experienced any kind of a loss growing up without a dad, because I had such a loving family environment.  My mom and my brother and me we so close, so tight-knit, that I honestly couldn't imagine how having a dad would have made anything different or better.  It wasn't until I had a dad in my family, parenting my children, that I truly see first hand what a loss that was.  I cannot imagine our lives without this fantastic dad in it.  


I'm so thankful for his way of being a dad.  He is the yin to my yang, and he makes this family work.  He is the perfect man for me, and he is an even more perfect father for my children.  As a mother, I wonder if I could have given my children a better gift all those years ago.  I don't think so.  I feel blessed because I had no idea what to look for, no one I wanted him to be like, no model of the shoulds and the should nots.  And thank you God for that.  Because it has allowed his fatherhood to thrive in his own way.  Not always in my way.  


Lawrence grew up with a father who gave him an awesome role-model.  He was involved and he was there and he was loving.  He showed his boys how to take care of business and how to throw a ball.  He required respect and he taught them to use the grill and love football.  Their grandpa may not realize that the best gifts he has given to his grandchildren was training up their dads to be like him, as he taught by example.  I'm so thankful for Steve because he showed Lawrence how to be a dad.  A very very good dad.  


We are entering into a new season of parenthood.  One where we still rely on naptime every day, but one where we don't have to carry a diaper bag with us every time we leave the house.  Our kids look to their dad more often than I can count to be validated by him.  And just when I'm about to worry that he isn't going to be sensitive enough to their needs, I'm reminded, again, that he will surprise me and meet their need in only a way that he can.  His relationship with him is so his.  Theirs.  


I feel nervous about the years ahead.  I remember when a friend told me years ago, 'we are now raising our kids, not just keeping them alive".  I feel like that.  There are so many difficult decisions to make, rules to keep, figuring out what's appropriate for which kid at which age, deciding which battles to pick.  And honestly, outside of giving it to God, the fact that I get to do all this with Lawrence is what keeps me confident that we will do it well.  That we are doing it well.  


And then I feel excited about the years ahead.  I see the investments of his time and energy, how can you not, they are everywhere.  He gives and gives and gives to our kids, and they are so lucky.  He talks about them and beams with pride.  He never talks about them like they are anything but his pride and joy.  Just ask him how great they are, he will tell you!  And he might even tell you if you don't ask.  What a wonderful memory it will be for them to look back and remember hearing their dad talking about them with such joy.  


Every single day, every single weekend, he gives them, he give us, a memory to savor.  He helps us live our lives to the fullest, and let me tell you, it's a lot of work making this much fun, this many memories for 3 little people.  He honestly never ever has an ounce of energy left at the end of the day, because he uses it all up for them.  Every. Single. Day.  



He teaches them to ski and throw and be active, he gives them a healthy example, he build legos, he teaches football, he let's them help him drill and built, he has them help him cook, he'd rather take them with him than go alone, he does cirque du soliel, he changes poopy diapers, he brushes teeth and puts on hats over messy hair, he packs, he carries, he straps on boots, he sets up, he takes down.  



I love him.  


I love you, Lawrence.  Thank you so much for the dad that you are, for the dad that you are becoming, and for the dad that you will be. As seasons change in our life, I wouldn't want to be doing this with any other man.  You make me excited for our years ahead.  I promise to partner with you, to make you better together than you could be alone, for all the years of our lives.  On a day like today, Father's Day, when we celebrate you - I will remind myself to never take one day parenting with you for granted.  I'm so lucky and blessed to have you as the Father to my children.  To be the only Father I've ever celebrated on Father's Day.  


I love you, I respect you, and I'm so so thankful for you!  And it is so obvious that your kids feel the same, your three wonderful children.  

Mostly Wordless Wednesday - Easter Freedom

Some weeks you have no time for words, I am amidst those weeks!


We had an incredible Easter/Passover weekend.  Each member of our family learned something new and amazing about God and his blessings.  We celebrated Jesus and His victory on the Cross.  We learned about the need in our human hearts, in this life, culture, society for a hero, a deliverer.  We learned why we still tell this story, thousands of years later, and why this story is everywhere.  In the Bible, in movies, in books, in pop culture.  A normal nice guy comes along and he is the one person who can save humanity, and he makes a choice, a sacrifice to do it.  We celebrated Moses. We celebrated the Jews being freed from slavery in Egypt.  We ate good meals and yummy treats together as a family and we enjoyed the sunshine.  We are healthy.  We are free.  So, we celebrated.

Holiday Love

Give Credit where Credit is due

Photos by www.ChristinaGilchrist.com

Card Design by Pinch of Spice on Etsy

It's the most wonderful time of the year

Angel on top

Tradition was started last year when everyone gets a turn

After a week in New York City, the girls and I got home, promptly decorated the tree (already picked out and standing by Lawrence and Bryson), played some driedel with Daddy, and were off to see Santa.  Now that our trip is over, there is a lot of holiday-ing to do, not to mention a very special little man's birthday coming up in 2 days!

Lily went first (although she is the one who insisted they all go up together).  ALL smiles.  Told him where she goes to school and how old she is, he cannot believe she is already 7, he remembers the first year he brought her presents and it doesn't seem like 7 years ago!

After MUCH deliberation about what to ask, how much to ask for, to get what she wants, but not to let Santa think she was greedy, she decided on:

1. Magic Tricks

2. The Original Annie Movie (no remakes please)

3. Matching Outfit for her and her AG doll

Addie also took a while to think about what she wanted.  She doesn't care if Santa thinks she is greedy, he can just bring less stuff, or choose what he wants, and if she hasn't been good, then he also doesn't need to bring as much.  whtatever.  Her attitude and carefulness over the decision is a 180 from her big sis.  

Her list: 

1.  Blue Paper

2.  Cars 2 Movie

3.  Cars Toy

4.  Stamps with a bin (the bin part is very important to her, she does NOT want willy nilly stamps running around with no place to keep them contained)

Bryson took several candy canes out of the basket while big sisters were taking their turn with Santa.  He broke some, sucked on some, put some back.  Stellar mother I am, I let him do what he wanted to those candy canes so that I could take advantage of the photo opps.  Santa asked him to try not to get Candy Cane in his beard when he came on board the lap.  

Yeah, who cares, have you TASTED this candy cane?

Because he is mine and I know him, he is shouting "JOVER" in this picture

He did however actually remember what he wanted when Santa asked, and I was impressed for sure.  

1. Grover (pronounced "Jover")

2. Handy Manny ("Mandy") tools

And so begins the most wonderful time of the year

Wordless Wednesday - This is what home looks like to me

Joseph, OR November 2011

Trick or Treat

Halloween Morning

This year Lily was Minnie Mouse and she wore her costume to first grade.
They had a Halloween Party and a Parade.
Since Addie goes to a Christian Preschool they don't celebrate Halloween, but had a PJ party instead.  To her, this was as good as getting to celebrate by wearing TWO costumes, and Bryson was thrilled to be matching to Addie in Thomas attire.

Halloween Night  

Bryson kept opening dum-dums, which have become our treat of choice to hand out so we don't eat one million of them before the trick or treaters come, however, now that Bryson is in this family that might have to change.  Almond Joy here we come.

Addie ran around the house shouting, Halloween, I've been waiting the whole year, over and over and over.  We had a very excited little race car on our hands.

A smile to make me smile

A family picture of sorts.  Need proof that there is 5 of us every once in a while.  

Every year on Halloween, this is our first picture, Backs walking up the sidewalk.  And now there are three.  Hmm, I feel a timeline comparison coming on...

Bryson did not stop at the first house, he kept going.  Man, he loved being "on the run" for trick or treating.  Pushing the door bell is another favorite of his.  So this was QUITE a treat.

I wish I would have gotten some video of them.  We trick or treated with our friends the O family and all the kids had a blast.  Bryson would ALWAYS ask for seconds, and because he was so cute, always said Trick or Treat, always said Happy Halloween, and always said Thank you and bye-bye, people kept giving him MORE candy.  He bucket was heavy and full but he carried it every step of the way.

The big kids waited at almost every house for little brother to get up the stairs, and we started pretty early, so there were a lot of houses with no one home.  It really was a crap shoot as to whether someone would answer the door.  Getting them to move on and accept that no one was coming to the door after 4-6 doorbell rings was a chore.

By the last house it was dragging on the ground.  And the hood to his costume was long gone.  Everyone once in a while he would bust out a "La la la laa, La la la laaa, Ewmo's woad"

Everyone was super happy to trick or treat our house, but Bryson was NOT super happy to be done trick or treating.

After a group shot the girls were really excited to be trick or treated and count their loot.  The traded in some of it for toys that daddy got for them.

Another holiday has come and gone, and I'm sure before long they will start thinking of what they want to be next year.  Last year at this time, they were going to go as the letter "L" and "A".  I'm happy they changed their minds.

The girls were doing all they could to drum up MORE trick or treaters.  Then every time we would get another trick or treater they would act all stressed out and busy at the task of getting candy into everyone's bucket.  So fun to watch.

My favorite line of the night (other than pretty much everything that Bryson did or said)...

Lily: Man, I would do ANYTHING to get more customers

Cast: 

Lily - Minnie Mouse

Addie - Lighting McQueen

Bryson - Elmo

Lucy - Fancy Nancy

Bailee - Pinkalicious

Jameson - Monkey