The honest scrap

What? We weren't supposed to be honest this whole time? Oh dear.

I've been tagged for this sort of thing for a year, here on the blogosphere, via MySpace or Facebook. I've never taken the time to do it, even though I'm often voted "mostly like to" (do wasteful things on the Internet?) Every time I do some cookey thing that seems completely normal to me, I think, hmmm, that would be on the "list". Also this seemed like a good way to try and break my writer;s block. There aren't many mom things on here, because I guess I feel I've shared all that, and this is supposed to be about me. Lily, Addie, here's why your mama is a nut!

So here are the "rules":

1. List 16 random interesting possibly unknown facts about yourself, with explanation when necessary.
2. Tag 6 friends + me to do the same at the bottom of your blog.

The reason this is called the honest scrap is because apparently what most bloggers do is they only blog the good or normal things about their lives and the odd, hard, or honest "scraps" of their life meet the cutting room floor and not their publics eye. This is interesting to me, because I find the "scraps" is where a lot of the good stuff lies. And it may be hard for me to come up with 16 things that someone doesn't know about me. Oh well, let's get started:

1. I make friends easily. duh. Now I know all of you know this about me. I also keep friends for a very long time, and I'm a pretty good friend to those I'm friends with. I keep in touch, I remember birthdays (mostly though that's fading somewhat), I write long heartfelt emails, I just plain old care about the sh$t that is happening in your life. I get a lot out of this. One of my great friends I met through a Craigslist ad. You know who you are. I've met two other friends through Craigslist ads about buying and selling baby stuff, and one gal from North Carolina before our trip.

2. Whenever I get off the phone or say good by to a loved one I like to finish with "I love you". The reason this is a little odd is because the real reason I do it is morbid. I think you might die before I see or talk to you again next and I want to know that the last words I've said to you were "Love ya". Does anyone else do it for that reason? Oh please please...

3. I like to drink hot coffee out of double stir straws. I also love it when my sweety/grossy coffee is the temperature that won't burn your tongue but still very hot, and I drink it fast and furious.

4. I love the feeling of drying out my ears with Q-tips.

5. My religious and political beliefs are very important to me and are the core of who I am, though I rarely feel the need to convince, share, or preach about them to anybody else. I'm also very open-minded so I can occasionally be swayed by someone whose opinion I respect very much. If you don't agree with me, I may not argue my point much because I don't really care if you agree much, and though it isn't my belief, I usually understand why you feel the way you do.

6. Documenting things in my life is sometimes as essential to me as living it. Sad...really.

7. I am a music idiot beyond measure. I don't know who sings anything, what they look like, the names of any songs. I dread the question, "what kind of music do you like?" because I barely know. I say "everything" and I think that's right, but I'm REALLY dumb when it comes to music. I blame this on the one radio station in my home town and a car radio that didn't work while on vacation. I didn't listen to much of anything until High School, and by then it was already embarrassing how much I didn't know. It never ceases to amaze Lawrence each new hollowness he learns about my music insufficiencies.

8. I'm never ever warm enough. I think heated seats would fix most of the problems in our marriage.

9. I lie about things that don't matter and it's second nature. I'm a very very descriptive liar. I don't ever lie about things that are important.

10. I've always "stalked" boys who've dumped me and their new girlfriends/wives. Facebook and myspace have NOT helped this. I used to have no tools other than drive by slowly or call and hang up, now their world is my oyster. I'm in...Ha! Not that it matters now. I would have had a field day in college. I still like knowing that I'm happier with this life than I ever could have been anywhere else. I'm the one that got away, not the other way around.

11. I'm scared of the dark. Like really scared. I'm a danger to myself and have, on several occasions, started at my own shadow. If I'm home alone, forget it, every light on the house is on and I stay in one room with the phone near by. I'm determined to never let my girls see my fear. I've been this way since the fourth grade.

12. My entire life I've been told I was beautiful, and I didn't ever believe that I was. Then years later I would look at pictures of myself at the time, and think, wow, I was beautiful, I wish I knew that then, and I wish I looked like that now... And I've kept doing that, like I'm 10 years behind seeing what everyone else is seeing. Not that it bothers, me, I guess I just wish we could see our own beauty at the moment, and see ourselves through others' eyes, rather than through our own self-critical goggles.

13. I have no sense of direction. And I do mean NONE.

14. I can't watch people embarrass themselves. In person, on TV, reality shows...all of it, I blush and hide my face.

15. Until I met Lawrence, I honestly thought that growing up without a dad didn't affect me.

16. Most people see me as someone who has much too much on their plate, though I know I'm mildly successful, I usually feel somewhat lazy, and I'm not sure why.

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Tag time: 6 + the person who tagged me...(Remember when you do your blog you are supposed to tag me back...and you better do the list!)

Carrie, Jenn, Heather, Robin, Dawn, Sharon, & Luke