I've been out of balance for a little over two weeks now. And it's wearing on me.
I'm trying to "cut the fat" of my life, the things that aren't adding any value and really focus on what is important. My kids. My husband. My job. My AuPair. These are the things that need me, and that I want to focus on.
In fact, I guess I should phrase it a little differently. After I cut out all the things that weren't adding value, it wasn't enough. I had to cut somethings that do actually add value. Sorry friends. Last week, I had to cut you too. No returned emails, no answered messages, no gchatting, no texts. I was happy to get a blog out for Bryson's 5th month, Mother's Day, and Sabine's bday. And those were on the weekends. All of you who know me, know that this place keeps me sane. I like to dump and organize here. My thoughts that is. Some pictures too, but right now I'm a digital mess of clutter and a real life mess of clutter too. So I'll dump a little here and there blog style and it will help me to attempt to feel some sense of being caught up.
For starters I stopped Facebooking about a week and a half ago. Cold Turkey. Sure some days it only sucks about 15 minutes of my precious time, but if you aren't careful it can accidentally suck an hour or two. And for me, that's valuable free time. And really, it's nice. It' s a lot of work keeping up with the daily happenings of all my old high school acquaintances and exboyfriends right on one screen. Which members of my family or excampmates are playing farmvilletown or mofiamobwars. Exhausting. So I disappeared from FB, and no one seems to have noticed. I miss it a little, which is sad, and probably why I should continue to stay away. Hey in that 15 minutes I could write a blog or return an email for cripes sake.
What am I getting at? Ya got me. I mentally chase my tail for several minutes when given a moment to do anything at all.
Today Lawrence has jury duty. His first time. Ha. He thought that because he isn't registered to vote he wouldn't get it, well, that's not a good reason to fulfill your civil duty because they will find you when you change your address at the DMV. He figures now that he is in the system, he might as well cast his vote now too. Finally.
Nancy Kules, thanks for the box from WWP. Lawrence is really excited about getting his office involved in some fund raising and he has lots of ideas. There. I've been meaning to send you a heartfelt email, but it just isn't coming. And I thought of it now, so there ya go. Cross that off my list! :)
Also, Carla, got that Gymboree Pirate Money swimwear for Bryson. SO cute. There will be a picture shortly. THANK YOU THANK YOU! I laughed at your description of when and where you were mailing it and that you lost the envelope. YES. Someone who understands my world.
Family Mainka & David and Zee Wilke I have a package ready to mail to you both for the last month. I'm sorry. It's coming.
See how I just organized thoughts, to do lists, emails, all in one shot? And I wonder why no one comments on my blog. I complained about it today in fact! I said, "am I that boring?" in fact. And I don't want THIS post to be the one that gets the answer to that question!
Bill Gates invested in my little software company. Well not my company, the company that I work for. This is very exciting stuff. But when the financial statements were due last week, it through me for a loop. I wanted everything to be perfect for the first quarter, coupled with reviewing data from while I was on maternity leave and figuring out quirks on a new accounting software, it took me WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY longer than I thought it would. I worked last week 75 hrs and slept about 25.
So, yeah, a little out of balance. This week has been better but I am catching up from everything that went on hold during the previous week, and trying to implement changes for things that I discovered over the past week. My awesome husband picked up the slack of parenting, even though he has a badly injured shoulder, my awesome friend and Au Pair took REALLY good care of the kids, and of me too, my resilient children loved me anyway and gave me great hugs and smiles. I know some parents hate it when their kids don't notice when mom is gone for a few days. They feel sad and jealous. All I feel is lucky. It means that my kids were given so much love and attention from their grandparents, dad, and Sabine, that they could do without it from me for a few days. Sure I wish I was with them and not in the office until midnight...but since that wasn't an option, I'm happy with how well they all adjusted.
Another thing I cut last week was working out. After doing the 30-day shred starting Feb 1 and ending on Mar 2, I have continued to work out at least 5 days a week, ever week. Except last week. I had to give in and miss that too. Luckily I'm already one day in this week, and will plan to be back at it. I still have the message board of really great girls who were waiting there to keep me accountable. I hate it though because working out had become second nature in my busy life. It was a when? question not an if? question. And I can already tell it will take a while to get back to that again. I'm dreading it, and one week off could easily turn into one month off in the blink of an eye. And the tiredness and lethargy. Ugh. Even 25 minutes adds a lot to my energy level. I blame it ALL on not working out, and NONE of it on the 25 hrs of sleep for a 6 day period!
Bryson slept last night through the night for the first time unswaddled and has taken both naps today unswaddled (one for 2 hrs one for a 1/2 hr). This is big news for us, as he is a swaddle sleeper and was getting WAY to big and old for his swaddle.
I have a few exciting things to tell you about, things that deserve a whole post on their own. No, we are not pregnant (GASP, I can't even imagine!). Stop thinking that is the only exciting "news" there ever can be in this world! :) I have a ton of super cute pictures to share too. But for now, I'll leave you with this - every time I look at it I smile. Again, a smile like that reminds you that you are doing something right. And for me, it puts me right back into balance...sometimes it just takes a bit longer than others...
Bill Gates invested in my little software company.
ReplyDeleteInteresting. I have no idea what's been going on with Schrodinger for the last five years, but THAT could certainly have an effect on the landscape.
Good for you, cutting out Facebook. I am close to doing the same.
Keep it up, you're doing great! My weeks of insanity are now turning to temporary calm, so I hope the same is true for you very very soon...
ReplyDeleteWow Jenny, no wonder you've been feeling out of balance. Good for you to slow down, cut out stuff that isn't necessary in your life right this minute and take stock. And I think it's great that your children have so much love that they are secure enough to whether a bit of time without mom. Love you
ReplyDeleteI'm an internet junkie, but I'm not big on facebook... you're right time sucker.
ReplyDeleteI'll pass on your note to Ryan- GO WWP! ;)
Did you get to see Meg recently? hope you had a nice visit!